It just takes time

If I could, I would wipe the tears from your eyes.                                                                                 But I can’t, because their mine.                                                                                                               And I’m lost, without, the touch of your hands.                                                                                     But soon, it will just take time.                                        Joe Alfers

One of the things, or should I say many of the things I had to do, is to make sure my wife keeps up with her regular medical doctor, her woman parts doctor, Rehabilitation doctor, etc…and dentist appointments.

Basically, to get them all up to date with her health, medications, new life and disability. She had to start all over with everything. It was like training your 2 year old child that weighed 130 pounds how to do the basic hygiene stuff all from the beginning. Not only is that difficult but just like a child, she will fight with you.

As I mentioned earlier, I created some simple “Excel” templates to help me organize myself to take care of her plus keep myself structured at home and work. I was on my own. Nobody was going to do this for me. I won’t go into detail on these items, but you are more than welcome to get an “.xls” or “.doc” file template from me later.  Some of the files were: Medications, Daily Schedule, Misc. Taxable, and Day Care Taxable. Anyway, just a few things that helped me along.

Helping her out of the “rental” hospital bed into her wheelchair. Going to the commode. Wiping, cleaning, bathing, dressing, etc….. She was completely helpless, paralyzed on her right side, and incoherent. This is what the hospital released to me because the insurance would not pay for any more hospital time, or acute rehabilitation time. Ah yes, thank you. But what can you do? There are a lot of people who will grab the bull by the horns and there are even more that won’t. I was one that took the responsibility. I know now, God knew that.

There are a lot of web sites on brain injuries, Dementia, Alzheimer’s, but not really how to deal with it on the caregiver’s side. Injury Groups, and chat sites didn’t really help either. I could not find anything that was as devastating as what this was. I am not saying that the others were not. I just couldn’t find anything. I finally ran into a couple people that had gone through the same situation as I. It was awesome to talk to these people and trade stories. First time I had laughed, and cried with someone in a long time. This was so important. And, so new to me. I was a loner, so to speak, and did not trust anyone.

I am going to keep these blogs short. Don’t want to bore you to death. As we travel though each day, one at a time, I realize that God works at “his” speed. Not ours! We live in a fast pace world. Everything is disposable it seems like. We want recovery now! Just like in the movies. But, reality suggests, that life is not a movie. We will not “snap” out of a coma and wonder why everyone is looking at us funny. Sad to say, but our life can change in the drop of a tater. Live life full, laugh, fart, have some wine and just have fun with your friends, family and lover.

Hasta la próxima.


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